Rosalia Rambles

Tag: books

  • Redundancy Review: Day 140-142, “Escapism”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia Rambles)

    Good morning fugitives and escapees, welcome to Day 140 to 142 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    Coming back to write after a busy few days. On Tuesday I had no time to write between work slamming me down before going out with my dad for the evening, and Wednesday was trying to spend some social time with friends before once more playing Clair Obscur.

    And now that I finally have a moment to write I find myself mentally preparing for a trip to London tomorrow to go to Metal Gear in Concert on Saturday before returning that evening and hopefully heading out on Sunday to see a group of old friends.

    Hopefully I will be able to write in between all that, but honestly I am mainly looking forward to having some escapism for myself away from my work. 

    Time away from my desk has been the main saving grace of the stress I have been under lately, especially considering writing is still not coming as easily to me as I would like it to. Going out with my dad, immersing myself in a fantasy world, and taking trips away from the place I live have all helped me step back to gain some perspective on my current situation.

    Though, I have always been someone who appreciates good escapism – books, video games, or even just my own thoughts backed with some good music. Having the ability to disappear from the world for any length of time usually helps me out, but with the amount of pain I have been feeling lately, this is definitely harder than before.

    Sometimes I wonder whether I should be using words like pain, hurt, or any other synonym that can describe the emotions that my depression inflicts upon my soul. Part of me feels it would be better to not go into such detail considering this is a website that faces outwards as a representative of myself.

    But then I reflect.

    And know that out there, someone somewhere might need to hear what I have to say.

    As confirmation that they are not alone in this world, and that they can escape into my writings to get away from whatever may be causing them pain.

    It is a bit of wishful thinking, but it is the reason I believe the written word always needs to exist as an artform. 

    “Art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable”

    I do not know how much of the latter I am able to do, but if I can at least achieve the former through what I write down and achieve some sense of relatedness within people who are reading, then I will consider myself successful.

    Even through my own pain, and as my schedule slips for all manner of different reasons, I will try my best to continue writing. 

    For both my and your escapism.

    Good news is that I at least have some kind of a review topic thanks to going out on Tuesday… if the schedule had held together then I would have actually had a decent week worth of review material, but alas, balancing everything that is required of me is still a difficult task.

    As part of my adventure out with my dad on Tuesday evening, we went to an Indian restaurant called “Mowgli”, a British chain focusing on street food style dishes. Everything above was paid for by my dad, so thanks for that!

    Specifically what was recommended to me by my dad was the Diwali Cauliflower and Yoghurt Chat Bombs in the first picture. The former is a delicately spiced half-head of cauliflower while the latter was a crisp puff bread filled with yoghurt and chickpeas which, true to the name of “bomb”, exploded into flavour once you put it into your mouth.

    The dishes I tried are in the second picture: the Mowgli Chip Butty and the Monkey Wrap. Both on a foundation of roti bread, with the former being stuffed with their signature fenugreek fries and an assortment of chutneys, and the latter being an open roti wrap topped with spinach & mint leaves, tandoori chicken, and the same assorted chutneys.

    The Monkey Wrap was definitely my highlight, especially as after taking one or two bits of chicken off the top it was the perfect amount of filling to pick it up like a giant Indian street food taco and eat it with one hand.

    Plus this definitely scratches the itch more for me than curry does. I am not sure what it is, whether I am yet to find the specific sauce that appeals to my palate but I have never developed a fondness for curry. Indian snacks and tandoori? Cannot get enough, but sauce served with rice or naan? Nope, never got a taste for it.

    That will do it for today, hopefully I will be able to write a bit more tomorrow, but unsure what the rest of the weekend will look like. Thank you for reading today’s edition of the Redundancy Review. Wherever you are I hope you are able to relax and take heart that the weekend is soon upon us.

    For more information on Mowgli, visit their website here: https://www.mowglistreetfood.com/ 

  • Redundancy ‘Review’: Day 138, “Sunday Guilt”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia Rambles)

    Good morning expectants and impatients, welcome to Day 138 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    Daylight savings time has ended in the UK, meaning the clocks went back one hour last night giving everyone an extra hour in bed… or in my case, even more time to spend playing Clair Obscur.

    I am only slightly sorry, it has been a long time since I have had a game where I can do nothing but sit and let myself become immersed in a fantasy world, especially one with so many themes that resonate with my current situation. 

    Though I do feel a little guilty, and I know it is somewhat of an irrational guilt with some grounding in reality. I feel worried that I should be doing more on my weekends, that even after stressful weeks I should forgo any meaningful relaxation time in favour of doing even more job applications or working on every personal project under the sun.

    But that is the “grindset mindset” I have developed from being within the tech industry, of the desire to always be moving, to move fast and break things because you never know what will be born from the wreckage – and it is a mindset I do not want to be in anymore.

    Being real, I am struggling to write today. I have been writing, deleting, and writing paragraphs, feeling completely unsatisfied with whatever I am trying to output and subsequently feeling guilty over that lack of output.

    I am seeing my therapist in two weeks time, so, that gives me both impetus to keep moving and to add what I am currently feeling to my greater notes… should probably send her a link to these posts as well, they do a pretty good job of keeping track of how these past months have gone.

    Also seeing the doctor tomorrow, to talk about the stress I have been experiencing because of work and other life factors, potentially looking at a route back to antidepressants to take some of the load off my brain.

    I will make it through this.

    One way or another.

    There is still so much I want to do.

    And I am scared I may not get the chance to do any of it.

    But I will not know unless I keep moving.

    Considering I am struggling to write today, I am going to skip the review segment, and I am going to make the thumbnail a screenshot that I took during a Clair Obscur cutscene today, being thoroughly called out by one of the characters.

    Short, and not very content-packed as some reviews have been this week, but I am at least still consistent.

    Thank you for reading today’s edition of the Redundancy Review. If you are in the UK I hope the clocks going back has not messed with your system too much, or brought down by how early it gets dark now because of that. For everyone else, wherever you are I hope you are able to relax and that the Monday blues are not too hard to bear.

  • Redundancy Review: Day 105, “Gaining Clarity”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia Rambles)

    Good morning soothsayers and oracles, welcome to Day 105 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    Being real it feels weird to be saying “one hundred and” each time I start off a new review past day 100, I did not think I was going to be keeping up all this time. I guess it goes to show even when the schedule slips and I miss a day or two (or three), the passion & care for my craft still persists.

    That said, there is actually a job search update. You know, that thing I said I would be doing a segment on during each review before it fell to the wayside and I found myself a role so itself became a redundant segment in an article series incited by redundancy?

    There are just moments where a silly thought comes into my head, and writing it out makes it sound even sillier but I absolutely love how it came out. The above is one of them.

    Anyway, back on track. Ended up applying for a manager position at the local CeX, which for the uninformed is a UK chain of technology exchange shops and it is pronounced exactly how you want to say it. For those of you who doubt the pronunciation or want to avoid saying it, the wi-fi networks in a shop are:

    • Protected CEX
    • Unprotected CEX

    I do not think any picture could be clearer than that on how the company wants the name to be pronounced.

    It is very unlikely I will get the position, considering whilst I have a wide raft of management skills along with generally transferable soft skills, I am an outsider applying to a retail environment, something which I genuinely have no experience in.

    In a way I feel it is a rite of passage I have missed almost, in that I never did any sort of retail role before landing in my current field, and my return to the tech industry came before I would have been eligible for temporary Christmas roles around town, so, if this somehow goes somewhere it would be my first shot at retail.

    But again, there are plenty more higher qualified candidates than I, so I doubt it will go many places.

    On the plus side today, my mentor figure got back in touch with me today to both give a compliment on this blog and to reassure me we were still on good terms, hence the title of today’s edition.

    That said… I am extremely exhausted for some reason, so I will do a short review for what I will now likely be calling “VTuber Tuesdays” for the foreseeable future because even though it will be predominantly Hololive, there will be days where the topic is just something VTuber related.

    Today it is the fact I had the Vedal plushie arrive and the packaging it came in absolutely made me laugh.

    Free him. Please.

    In all honesty, this is such a high quality plushie. The shape is absolutely perfect to what I would want a Vedal plush to be, in that I can hold him like a burger and it feels right to do so.

    But not only that:

    He balances perfectly on the Neuro-sama plush I have.

    It could not be more beautiful if I tried.

    Anyway, that is me, I need to sleep. Thank you for reading today’s edition of the Redundancy Review. Wherever you are I hope you are able to get some good sleep yourself, no matter the time of day.

  • Redundancy ‘Review’, Day 104: “Despite Everything

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia Rambles)

    Good morning humans and monsters, welcome to Day 104 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    For someone who consistently wishes that the Monday blues do not hit people too hard whenever she signs off a Sunday article, god damn do I feel like I have been hit by a truck today.

    All of a sudden last night my impostor syndrome flared up something fierce, not only making me doubt the efficacy of whatever I am doing on this site, or if I am even worthy enough to hold my current position within QA.

    The answer to the latter is simple: yes, yes I am. My brain is just stupid and exhausted from constantly worrying about the situation I am currently in which causes me to ignore my track record as a QA professional and that I would have not sustained a close to five-year career if I did not have some amount of pride or professionalism in my work.

    That, and I am a magnet for bugs no matter what I play… though it seems to happen a lot more randomly in EA games which is very thematically appropriate given my history with the company.

    One way to prove that taking time to rest is helping my brain redshift on what things mean to me is that my body’s response to these feelings is not feeling the need to push myself further, in fact, it is quite the opposite – I feel myself slowing to a crawl, but still trying my best to move forward.

    I think that is all I can really ask for given the year that I have had, that I can keep moving forward and do so with the acknowledgment that I am still here today, even when there was so much that could have brought me down for good, not only in this year, but in so many years prior.

    Considering Undertale’s tenth anniversary was over the weekend, I think the image is pretty thematic.

    Even though I was never really part of the fandom surrounding Undertale and everything that came with it, it is hard to believe such an impactful game is already ten years old. Ten years ago I was in sixth form (name for British education from 16-18 in some schools), possibly some of the worst years of my life due to academic stress, identity worries, and trying to navigate a much lonelier world than I had before.

    When one day, I reconnected with a friend on the bus home from school, talking about some of the stuff I had been up to and what he had been up to, with the conversation eventually turning to Undertale. I mentioned I had heard of it but had not really seen anything about it at all.

    It was given to me as a Steam gift later that evening from that same person… wherever you are right now Sam, whatever you have been getting up to… I hope you are living a fantastic life, and know that I still treasure the memories of our friendship.

    Undertale appeared at one of the lowest points of my life, and even if I only played through it once (neutral route into Pacifist, cause good god I did not have the mental fortitude to do Genocide back then and I certainly do not have the cojones to do it now), the experience still left an impact on me. 

    I still listen to the music, and those immortal words in that screenshot still stick with me today.

    Despite everything, I am still me. I am still keeping on, even if the last ten years have changed me drastically. And that is something that is worthy of celebration.

    Not really a review per se, more just a story that still holds significance in my mind and in a way is topically relevant to recent events. Fuck it, I will put the inverted commas on and post this up, cause I appreciate what I wrote today.

    And I appreciate you for reading today’s edition of the Redundancy Review. Wherever you are, I hope your Monday blues are not hitting too hard and that you are still able to get things done today.

  • Redundancy Review: Day 92 & 93, “Still Processing The Con”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia Rambles)

    Good morning scribes and ghostwriters, welcome to a double feature for Day 92 & 93 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    Feels weird to say but even after returning to normality today by getting back to work, my mind is still dwelling on VExpo and everything I got up to during that time. I find it funny, that even though there was a lot of organisational scuff and my energy did not sustain me as long as I wanted it to; I would still do it all again this weekend.

    In a way I am trying to ride the high while attempting to convert post-con depression into post-con motivation. I returned to playing Beat Saber yesterday as a form of exercise and, whilst I am most certainly out of practice, half an hour let me work up a good sweat which should hopefully build into doing more exercise like that in future weeks.

    I also find myself being a little bit more aware of my diet, committing to smaller scale lunches than what I would normally eat in the hopes of slowly but surely slimming down my waistline. Whilst I still feel I will not be able to fit into the majority of off-the-shelf cosplays, there will still be some benefit in feeling better in my body wearing whatever custom creations I end up getting, along with fitting into my current wardrobe better.

    The main two things I need to keep in mind are:

    1. Progress is slow
    2. Progress is not linear

    Or, to borrow a very impactful quote from Bojack Horseman (great series, do not think I can ever rewatch the whole thing):

    “It gets easier. Every day it gets a little easier. But you gotta do it every day, that’s the hard part. But it does get easier.”

    So long as I can try commit to doing some small amount of exercise each day, I can push myself to being in a better position a few months from now, which should hopefully put me in the best position possible by the time the next VExpo comes around.

    Do not think there is much to say beyond what I have said, my mind feels oddly foggy over the last two days and whilst I keep myself moving, I find it hard to write about the last couple of days emotionally – so I am going to jump into the review segment and do a… sort of song review, it is hard to sum up what exactly this classes as.

    When I did my initial Helldivers 2 review, I focused primarily on the gameplay loop rather than any of the narrative theming as I wanted to explain the core game succinctly.

    Reviewing the Super Earth National Anthem is my way of making up for not talking about the narrative, because the satire of militaristic fascism and how consistent Arrowhead are with making bombastic propaganda is one of the main draws of the game in my opinion.

    And “bombastic propaganda” is exactly how I would describe the National Anthem, right from the start it launches into justifying Super Earth’s campaign of liberation:

    “Freedom must reign over every last star.
    Through citizen’s blood spilled in our righteous wars.
    Honor their deaths, do your part for the cause.”

    It is a hilarious juxtaposition within the world, as it acknowledges that the “freedom” that Super Earth brings comes with an inordinate amount of civilian casualties, to the point that accidental civilian deaths in game only account to small fines to the basic currency acquired for completing objectives. 

    There have been several points in game where a minefield I have placed down has absolutely destroyed a group of civilians and all I get is some requisitions docked and a small reprimand from my Democracy Officer… yes, Democracy Officer, again, this game oozes political satire from every orifice.

    And it ramps up even further within the next verses after these ones, but I want to in particular highlight:

    “No questions or doubts shall be allowed
    Traitors will all be disavowed”

    Not even just doubts, merely questioning Super Earth is enough to make you a traitor. 

    Kill a bunch of civilians with a napalm barrage? Slap on the wrist.

    Ask why Super Earth’s elite have access to napalm barrages? Face the wall.

    I could honestly go through each verse of the anthem and explain the brilliance behind the satire, but I think I can sum up the entire song briefly: it works.

    As a piece of propaganda, the Super Earth National Anthem works because, despite the horror of the lyrics, it makes me feel patriotic to Super Earth and makes me want to dive on the fascist bugs, the socialist bots, and the xenophobic squids…

    …I initially did have a screengrab from the video itself prepared as the thumbnail, as I usually do, but I had a brainwave as I was writing that previous paragraph and, as the song says, anything less will not suffice.

    I am most certainly not immune to propaganda, but so long as it is only fictional nations that I am falling under the sway of, I think I should be fine.

    That will do it all for today, thank you for reading this, as usual, emotionally confusing edition of the Redundancy Review. Wherever you are I hope you can find some time to relax, the weekend is not that far away so I know you can make it.

  • Redundancy Review: Day 91, “Post-Con Depression”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia’s Rambles)

    Good morning axolotls and mudpuppies, welcome to Day 91 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    With my writeup done yesterday and now fully situated back at home… yeah, the post-con depression is starting to creep in. VExpo was possibly the full highlight of my year despite all of the complications leading up to it in regards to cosplay and some of the organisational slip ups the convention itself had, and now to be back to normality is… kind of rough feeling.

    A lot of people read my writeup yesterday too, which is really sweet to see. I want to try use that positive energy VExpo gave me to keep trying to improve myself, because now I have truly had a taste of life on the outside again and god fucking damnit if I do not want more experiences like that.

    Which y’know, is kind of the right energy to take away from something like this, and part of my logic is that I am pretty much exhausted every weekend anyway, so why not just be exhausted at a convention? Especially with the fact I want to turn the red dress I wore on the Saturday of VExpo into carrying even more plushies to make it almost like an ita dress but full of plushies instead.

    Helps to keep track of them too, since they are pretty much always facing front I do not have to worry too much about someone coming up to try swipe one – though I should probably invest in a decent carry bag anyway if I want to carry any larger ones around on show.

    The next potential event I could go to is London or Birmingham MCM, my usual old convention haunts from the before times (meaning pre-COVID), with London being near the end of October, and Birmingham being at the end of November. Both of them are pretty tempting options even though I do not really gel with the structure of MCM-style conventions in the UK, though, there is still one prevailing issue…

    Funds.

    Whilst I am currently in relatively stable work, I know at any moment I could be back to being in the shit once more and that makes me a little risk averse when it comes to making big ventures out, especially to events that I do not feel 100% on.

    It is also a balancing act, cause I would love to go to more events, but I also want to go to those events in cosplay, and support artists, and treat them like holidays, but doing all of those things on top of event and travel expenses make the margins tight, especially in my current position.

    So what does this mean?

    Need to work harder obviously.

    Falling into complacency was something I did a lot prior to my redundancy, of accepting my status quo and struggling to change. For the sake of my future security and to get the ability to go to more events, I cannot allow myself to fall back into that.

    And if you agree with that you should consider hiring me for some writing work!

    (god that was cheesy as fuck)

    But genuinely, I am proving myself with writing every day. My VExpo writeup was near 7000 words done in approximately four hours with images, social media linking, and detailed back research on social channels to make sure all my information was correct.

    I want to write.

    I want to earn my way through writing.

    And I want to write my story across multiple events for the foreseeable future, or until my body finally gives up the ghost.

    With that call to action done, time to head into the review segment, and well… it feels kind of weird to do a Hololive Tuesday right after doing a giant convention write up, but I think this will be a good opportunity to highlight some of the artists I bought from over the weekend, starting with Mercury Designs with this gorgeous Nerissa Ravencraft acrylic standee.

    For brief VTuber context, Nerissa Ravencroft is a part of Hololive English Generation 3 “Advent”, which is my all time favourite group of virtual people – and being honest, initially I was not all that interested in Nerissa as a talent, especially when looking at the other members of Advent.

    But over time, her streams and actions slowly started carving a place in my heart for her, to the point now where I have considered cosplaying both of her outfits at one point in time, partially because it is a character where my actual height would lend to it extremely well.

    Anyway, back on track with the art.

    When I was browsing the VExpo art catalogue they posted, Mercury Designs was one that caught my eye, though it was actually for a Cecilia Immergreen standee than anything else, and during one of my artist alley walks I remember seeing it and having something click in my brain like “Oh yeah I was supposed to check these guys out”.

    And whilst the Cecilia caught my eye once more, something about the composition of the Nerissa standee just looks so elegant, with the back piece of acrylic giving it an almost magical look to it. For £25 as well it is a solid price to support a small artist, and this is not including the fact I walked away with two A5 prints and a bunch of stickers from them too.

    A shorter review than yesterday, but, I do not think anything will top yesterday for a long while. Thank you for reading this edition of the Redundancy Review, wherever you are I hope you are able to take things easy today. I am going to continue letting my legs recover from VExpo.

    For more information on Mercury Designs and to purchase from their shop, visit the link here: Mercury Designs UK – Shop

  • Redundancy ‘Review’: Day 84, “Accepting Defeat”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia’s Rambles)

    Good morning wounded and weary, welcome to Day 84 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    So, after much stress, deliberation, stress, sleeplessness, stress, panic, stress, rushing, and stress… I have decided to abandon cosplaying at my upcoming convention.

    It hurts to reach this conclusion, especially after looking forward to it for so long, but after having a rough night last night where everything started piling up on top of me at once and trying to do some last minute plans/adjustments today, the notion all became a bit much for me, and considering the stressful year I have had up to this point, I want to go into my convention weekend with as few worries as possible.

    Which sucks to come to the conclusion to, but given my body gets very close to giving up movement entirely once my stress levels reach a certain point, this is the right decision as much as I would normally keep fighting.

    And being completely honest, I am hurt. Things got derailed so massively in planning this aspect of my convention holiday that keeping everything on track in addition to doing my day-to-day responsibilities just became overwhelming, and with two days to go, the stress is not worth it now.

    A positive aspect I can at least consider now is having more time to plan out a proper approach to cosplay, taking my time with things more to have it all ready for next year’s convention… a weird thing to think about, not used to thinking that far in the future currently.

    I genuinely feel like I am one more disaster away from having a complete breakdown, which, is… fun to think about.

    But I have to keep going.

    I still have things I want to live for.

    So even if it hurts right now, I will try to keep moving.

    …feels a bit weird to do what I was planning for my review segment, but, it is Hololive Tuesday, and I want to at least talk a bit more about what my plan was for the convention, so, here is the reference sheet of one Shiori Novella of Hololive English Advent.

    If it is not already clear from the amount of times I have reviewed something Advent related for Hololive Tuesday and ended it off with calling Shiori beautiful, or stunning, or various complimentary adjectives: I love Shiori Novella so much. She is one of my many oshi, possibly in contention for being my kamioshi.

    As a goth myself, I fell in love with her design ever since it was revealed, absolutely loving her dress, her hair, and her big ass jacket. But, after she debuted and started talking on stream, her honesty & realness really resonated with one early clip in particular standing out for me:

    What people see of Shiori from the outside is usually someone who says something silly or off-the-cuff, leading to silly or lewd moments with others, but when you dig deeper on her, you realise this is a person who is not afraid to show their emotions, to be excited to share stuff with people and to be open in the harder times.

    As someone who writes daily about how they are feeling and trying to maintain honesty as I do so, Shiori’s personality resonates with me a lot, which is why I wanted to cosplay her.

    Additionally, her outfit always looked like something that could look reasonably okay out on the street, compared to other Hololive outfits – especially the jacket. If I were able to get a high enough quality one as part of a cosplay commission that was made out of a sturdy fabric, I genuinely feel I would use it as an everyday jacket during the winter.

    Plus, being fully upfront, I genuinely have considered getting my hair cut in a similar style to hers. Not matching the dye because that would be way too much to maintain on my own, but just matching the cut and seeing how it feels on me.

    Anyway, that is enough silly VTuber ramblings for the day. I am very tired, and kind of just want to curl up now.

    Thank you for reading the Redundancy Review all the same. I hope you are having the best day you can.

    For more information on Shiori Novella, visit her Youtube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/@ShioriNovella 

  • Redundancy Review, Day 67, “A lot of spacing out”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia’s Rambles)

    Good morning astronauts and stargazers, welcome to Day 67 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy review.

    Committing to a short one for a variety of reasons:

    • My brain is spaced out to hell right now
    • It is a Saturday and I would not mind continuing to relax especially after a somewhat stressful morning
    • What I want to review I have not taken time to do screenshots yet especially as it is from another game I have 100%ed

    So, I will do a short check-in and a short review.

    Last night and this morning were oddly rough, my emotions have been in a heavily spiked state leaning specifically towards the sad side of things, thoughts of being a failure, my writing not being good enough, and myself not being good enough for my friends. Thankfully my partner has been there for me to talk me down through it all, but it definitely still feels a little hard to bear with my own head right now.

    The spaciness I am feeling does not massively help things either, as in some instances I feel oddly disconnected from my body, leading my mind to just wander as I lie down and everything feels oddly floaty. It is entirely possible it is related to my antidepressant weaning, and that this is one of the withdrawal symptoms, meaning it hopefully wears off soon.

    But for now, I relax, and try my best to unwind from my work week – which non-awkwardly leads into what I want to talk about today: one of my favourite videos to have on in the background to zone out to.

    Defunctland is a Youtube channel specialising in documentary-style videos talking about various theme park-related topics, ranging from deep dives into the history of the Disney parks to one-off attractions at smaller venues. Kevin Perjurer is an absolute delight to listen to across any video, his deadpan delivery of certain lines adding to the humour of his witty scriptwriting.

    Specifically this video is one people might recognise, as it is the main video on his channel that went insanely viral, accumulating 24 million views in just under four years currently. Despite it being a little weird to say, it is a video I often find myself returning to for comfort, having watched it multiple times over the years.

    I can say the same for a lot of Kevin’s videos, but something about the FastPass one just brings a familiar feeling of comfort that lets my brain truly turn off and stop being so damn loud whenever I have it on. Whether it is the delivery of the jokes remaining timeless, or the fact there is so much research and effort put into each segment of the video, the movie-length nature does not put me off in the slightest.

    Since it is a video, I need to find a screengrab for the thumbnail of this post, and I know the perfect image.

    This is my favourite punchline to a joke in this entire video, I will not spoil it for anyone who wants to watch but if you do not feel like watching the entire thing (completely reasonable given its runtime), just watch from around the 57:00 mark for around a minute to get the full effect.

    Despite this essentially being a placeholder day, I am oddly proud of this one. It still feels like I put effort into it and fills the criteria of why my daily work has a “review” segment – to show off something that makes me happy, and today’s topic certainly does.

    All the same, thank you for reading this edition of the Redundancy Review. I hope you can enjoy a relaxing Saturday wherever you are and that the looming spectre of Monday is not bringing you down too much.

    For more information on Defunctland, visit their Youtube channel here: https://www.youtube.com/@Defunctland/featured 

  • Redundancy Review: Day 64, “Survival, at any cost”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia’s Rambles)

    Good morning Marios and Donkey Kongs, welcome to Day 64 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    Ended up making a mentor figure in my life upset yesterday over the fact I had taken the contracting role, which, considering it is out in the open now, may as well explain it.

    So, what caused my redundancy was the entire company I worked at going under, leading to all of us losing our jobs. Then after a while a former colleague got in touch with me and asked if I wanted a contracting opportunity – the people who had bought the assets and IP needed a skeleton crew to push things over the finish line, and they needed a QA.

    Being upfront and honest, I was initially going to tell them to go fuck themselves, hence why I called Day 25 “The Call of Yesterday”. The investors & the board had done enough damage to my psyche throughout this whole process that I was fully willing to take a stand and hold on to my selfish pride…

    …that lasted about a weekend before I decided to sign on, thanks to some guidance from another person who had also signed on. I initially kept it quiet amongst the social group I was in with my former colleagues cause I did not want to upset anyone who was struggling, but the topic of conversation came up last night so I decided to mention it.

    She had pressed me for names of everyone else who was working there since I was an “insider” and I had refused, partially cause that was not my information to give. This made my mentor a bit upset, to the point she left the group which really made me feel like an ass, even if in hindsight it feels like a bit of an overreaction to leave on the knowledge of some people in the group still working for the old blood.

    Afterwards I had offered to leave myself to see if it would make others feel better, as I had outed myself as an “insider”, and knew that might still make people uncomfortable.

    I very quickly had four (now five) separate people sending different variations of “do not leave”, from a simple “nope” to reminding me of how my mentor can react in emotional situations, but there seemed to be a common theme amongst all of them.

    This contract is temporary, I know it will end at some point after the work is done and the board once more will have no use of me, discarding me back to the Jobcentre. 

    But in the meantime, I can survive.

    And regardless of how I felt going in, or how my actions have made others feel, ultimately I can not be blamed for making a decision in the interest of my own survival – even if it does clash with my tendencies of making sure no one is upset by what I do… yes I know that is oxymoronic with what I said yesterday about not being erased or silenced but stay with me.

    It feels difficult to have alienated this mentor figure in virtue of the fact she was one of the most supportive people in my life during my work under the previous company. She was always someone I could rely on to “unfuck my brain” and was one of the few people I could turn to when my hormones were close to making my mind collapse in on itself. 

    In general everyone I worked with was incredibly supportive and accepting of who I was, which is why the idea of making any of them frustrated, annoyed, or disappointed is a painful concept to me.

    Ultimately, I do not know where my career wants or needs to go next. Part of me wants to try turn my baking and pickling hobbies into something I can use as supplemental income, I am slowly writing the stories I want to tell whilst weaving my everyday story, and despite the fact I am out of love with the tech industry as a whole I am still good at what I do.

    For now though, I survive, in the hope of finding where I can thrive.

    I think it is time for some more emotional whiplash though, as we go from the fear of letting those close to you down to talking about, what else, pirate metal.

    Jonathan Young is one of my favourite musical artists, having initially discovered him through his covers of anime openings that so many Youtube musicians start out with, to witnessing his creative breakdown of 2017-2018, and then seeing him rise as an original songwriter creating beautiful pieces of music from scratch before following it up with his latest era of original songs based on nerdy properties.

    The song I am covering today comes from his debut album of fully original music, “Starship Velociraptor”, attributed to Galactikraken, which in his own words is “definitely a real band and NOT just Jonathan Young pretending to be several aliens from the future” – the song in question being the pirate metal entry of the album, “Glory or Gold”.

    From a personal enjoyment standpoint, I have a soft spot for anything pirate themed. One of my favourite Magic decks revolves around pirates, and I sometimes jokingly call myself a pirate captain due to the fact when my full preferred name is written out, I have had a friend call it a “fucking pirate queen” name, which totally did not go to my head as one of the most badass compliments I have ever received.

    The overall vibe of the song is, fittingly for pirate-themed metal, rebellion. From the opening verse to the bridge to the chorus and straight into the second verse, bridge, and chorus, every word in this song hammers home the fantasy of being a god damn space pirate fighting against the plutocracy – a feeling I think a lot of people can relate to in the modern day…

    …the fact I can not really decide whether that statement applies to “being a space pirate”, “fighting the wealthy”, or “fighting the wealthy as a space pirate” is rather amusing.

    One part of the lyrics I do want to highlight though is the bridge before both choruses, especially for the last line:

    “So hoist up the Jolly Roger

    We’re taking a ride

    Take back the life that they denied”

    Speaking as an artist, a trans person, and someone who went through a major life change a couple months back, I feel a lot of my personal progression going forward makes this line resonate with me a lot. 

    Regular readers will know the usage of the phrase “my life has been destroyed”, but when I think about my current role, the things I am trying to do, and where I want to go next, I am taking back what was denied from me: in making my art, in living my truth, in what was taken from me with my day job being yanked away.

    The instrumental on this song is insane as well, though I have to give special mention to the drumming. In line with the flavour of Galactikraken’s drummer being a four-armed alien the background drumming rhythm is layered and intense, especially intensifying in the last ten seconds of the song to finalise it in a perfect way.

    Which is insane in the greater context of the album, as this is the first song you will hear and it ends off with such a powerful beat, fully setting you up for the rest of the amazing songs on the album – which I do actually own as a signed CD by the man himself, one of my proudest musical possessions outside of my physical Dragonforce collection.

    Obligatory picture for the thumbnail, taken from the gorgeously animated music video…

    That is two back-to-back Redundancy Reviews I have done where emotional whiplash comes into play from using the mental check-in portion to talk about something heavy, and then do a full 180 degree pivot to talk about something way more positive. Regardless, I hope you enjoyed reading today. Once more, please remember to stay cool and hydrated wherever you are.

  • Redundancy Review: Day 33, “Back to Reality”

    Redundancy Review: Day 33, “Back to Reality”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia’s Rambles)

    Good morning workers and drones, welcome to Day 33 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    As the temperature slowly comes back down, the start of my new job comes across the horizon, so this means it is the last Redundancy Review before the title itself becomes redundant.

    My intention is still to keep going with the series, primarily as a form of practice to keep my brain active when it comes to writing and to keep an archive of what is going on in my life. I still feel a deep connection to storytelling and keeping this living journal going means I have a record of how I felt at all times… even if the feelings are inconsistent day-to-day.

    The goal today is to tidy a few final things up, primarily my desk. After the first couple days once the news had hit I stopped using it as a desk and ended up making it a storage space for other things, the vacuum cleaner, boxes, random junk, but now it is going back to being my workspace.

    Hopefully having that routine helps me rebalance my energy, but also things cooling down should help my sleep as well. I think that is one of the main things that is hampering my ability to write some days. I feel so damn tired even with an adequate amount of sleep, and the brain fog just creeps in when my rhythm starts to get there.

    On average, it takes me an hour to write a Redundancy Review – and this is not pure writing time. I will write a short bit, scroll a bit on social media or Youtube, go back to write more, go make a drink, write more, grab some screenshots or pictures for whatever I am reviewing, and then finalise it before publishing on WordPress.

    Which y’know, that on again off again approach does lead to a lot of my reviews feeling rambly, but uhh…

    …look at the website name I guess?

    I am going to skip the call to action for a while, not only to let myself focus on my new role but also whilst my brain tries to find a balance between writing and working.

    Today’s review subject comes off the back of a discussion I had with some friends last night which started because of seeing that the Ferrero Group (most known for Ferrero Rocher) own the manufacturing rights for Crunch Bar in the United States, with the worldwide distribution being handled by evil company supreme, Nestle.

    Which now makes me want to have the Ferrero Group take over production in the UK as well, because I have a very soft spot for Crunch Bars as my non-Galaxy chocolate of choice, partially for their simplicity.

    Crunch Bars are standard bars of chocolate with crisped rice mixed in, though the specific formulation of chocolate means the bar itself is harder than other brands on the market, leading to each mouthful having more bite than you would expect.

    Another reason I was drawn to Crunch Bar back in the day was because they were usually cheaper than other brands – only by like 50p, but as a broke ass student, that small amount of money made a lot of difference in my choices.

    But of course, I have to balance this review out by stating that whilst I enjoy Crunch Bar, Nestle is one of the shittiest corporations around. 

    The fact their Wikipedia page has a dropdown icon under the “Controversies” heading should tell you enough, but seeing that the list includes things such as “baby formula marketing” and straight up “water” paints a clear picture of scumminess. Me wanting the Ferrero Group to take off is basically a lesser of two evils scenario, because at least they have the appearance of wanting to care.

    You know, for being a left-leaning trans girl, it sure took me a while to launch into an anti-corporate rant on this site – done plenty of anti-AI rants, but had not yet railed against a corporation.

    Thank you for reading the last truly redundant Redundancy Review, I hope you can stay cool and hydrated whilst the temperature goes back down so you can enjoy a relaxing Sunday.

    Here is where I would do promotion for my review topic, but fuck promoting Nestle, instead I am going to promote Tony’s Chocolonely, a more ethical brand of chocolate: https://uk.tonyschocolonely.com/