(for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia Rambles)
Good morning officers and infantry, welcome to Day 459 and 460 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.
Yeah, missed a post yesterday after having a very good weeklong streak, but it was for a somewhat good reason as I spent the majority of the day at a friend’s house for a BBQ and general social gathering, coming home at nine in the evening and being thoroughly exhausted alongside being a bit demoralised.
Last night was the First Come, First Served sale for the Vexpo meet and greet tickets, and it was confirmed that every talent had at least one ticket available, meaning I had a shot at grabbing one for Shiori. In hindsight, I should have focused my bandwidth on going after some other talents instead like Mint, Matara, or Wunder Riku, all people I would have loved to meet and chat with for a short while, but the chance to meet my kamioshi was too great.
I did end up getting one ticket I had applied for but not won in the form of Dr.NOVA(e) from V4Mirai, and I still have my ticket to meet Ironmouse as well which are going to be two fantastic opportunities, but I cannot help but feel some amount of hurt or disappointment in not being able to snag Shiori.
There is a lot I have done to try comfort and console myself in the aftermath, seeing that many prominent community members have got tickets is awesome to see, as I know they were probably as locked in as me to try see if they could get anything in the sale, and part of me knows that if I got the chance to meet Shiori there is a full possibility I would flub my words entirely resulting in me just crying for the majority of the meet.
But it still hurts, and it still did a number on my already-depleted morale that I felt I was not clever enough in my approach to the sale, when the majority of it would have just been luck anyway. I know there will be more chances to meet her in future, and that I will still have the opportunity to cheer her on as part of the Serendipity screening on Thursday.
It would have been nice, all the same.
Keeping my morale up in general during this time feels hard, as some days I will wake up ready to conquer the world and do everything I need to do to get my life back on the track I want to be on… and some days waking up is extremely difficult, as I try to muster what little strength I have to even function, resulting in me feeling negative for the rest of the day.
The worst part about those days is feeling as if I am not entitled to have them, that I need to keep myself together and present a strong front so I can support those around me. I know this is not the case, and I am allowed to feel sad on my bad days, but this crushing weight of expectation never seems to leave me how much those in my life affirm that I am okay to not be okay.
Writing it all down helps, cause otherwise I definitely would let everything bottle up inside, and even then there are moments where I keep it all on the inside for fear of letting my own mind overwhelm me.
I will make it through, and I will see a better tomorrow. There is so much I still need to live for, and I want to be around the people I love when it happens.
For now though, I will take whatever boosts of morale I can get, which includes the subject of today’s review.
On Friday I went out with my parents for dinner at a place called “OK Diner”, a small chain of American-style diners in the UK that offer a melange of options for hearty and filling meals, with my eyes firmly set on having a big and greasy burger to warm my soul.
Disclaimer, my parents were the people to pay for this, and admittedly I did go overboard with the knowledge that someone else was paying for my food that evening, but I will include the price as always. Thanks again, mum and dad, I really appreciate you treating me to things like this when life has really been getting me down these last months.
Without further ado, behold: the double patty breakfast burger served with curly fries.
My heart was set on a burger, as it is one of my all-time favourite things to order from any big restaurant to lift my spirits after a rough time period, and one of my strongest food opinions is that any burger can be improved with the simple addition of a fried egg on top, meaning that a burger topped with bacon, egg, and hash brown to form a breakfast burger was the perfect thing to indulge in after restraining myself from eating out due to not having a job.
Although I will admit, going for a double patty rather than a single six-ounce patty was a minor mistake on my part. Whilst I was still able to clear my plate and had a whale of a time doing it, I did feel a bit ill afterwards due to eating so much food
That said, I could have cried when biting into such a decadent feast after so long of practicing restraint to ensure my runway lasts as long as possible. It feels silly to say, as after all it is just food, but meals out with my partner were one of my favourite ways to spend time with him when I was still gainfully employed, and I hope to enjoy another during our Vexpo trip as part of the “forget about all the problems” aspect.
But what did this indulgence cost? Including an 80p charge for upgrading my fries to curly fries, the total came to £20.30. Whilst I would fully be comfortable paying for this myself in any other circumstance, the fact I was able to get such a delectable treat essentially for free feels so amazing.
That covers it for today, we only have about three reviews left until I head to Vexpo in the coming week, so I will aim to make them good ones. Thank you for reading today’s edition. Wherever you are, I hope you have had an enjoyable weekend, and that the Monday blues do not bring you down too hard tomorrow. It feels weird to not dread Sunday as I have done in the past, but I hope you have a good day at work tomorrow.
Rosalia Rambles 