Rosalia Rambles

Tag: redundancy

  • Redundancy Review: Days 70-74, “Small Victories, Big Losses”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia’s Rambles)

    Good morning bassists and drummers, welcome to a massive catch-up post for a bunch of missed days of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    A lot of what I write for the review is self-indulgent. I talk about my emotions, things that make me feel happy, and food I have eaten that tasted good. The entire series is a reflection of myself written down as a living record.

    And so, given the fact I took a very hard loss over the last week, I am going to take today’s catch-up post to let my emotions fly a little bit, because fuck me do I need it.

    There has been a lot that has gone wrong in my life, wasted my degree years due to stubbornness, losing friends cause of a lack of emotional intelligence, and going through severe periods of distress due to transition related issues.

    But I can comfortably say that the last three months of my life have been the worst period I have ever experienced – and that is fucking saying something considering how dark my mind got during my university days.

    Ever since I got the news that the company I worked for was in the shit, I have been fighting every day to try get small victories, and I should not minimise the fact that even small victories mean a lot when I have gone through what I have gone through.

    But for every small victory I feel like I take a big loss alongside it, and I am really fucking tired of that happening.

    Even in the last couple of days I have taken a small victory and a big loss simultaneously with my custom cosplay order falling through two weeks before my convention. The seller was courteous and offered me a full refund for my disappointment, which is the small victory, but the big loss comes from the fact this outfit felt like it was going to be the centrepiece of my convention holiday – something I have been looking forward to all year and now I have to go put together a backup plan in a short amount of time.

    I am not going to name and shame the seller. As part of the refund I agreed that I would not leave a negative review, and I am sticking to that. I would much rather move on and try make something positive out of this mess… finding yet more small victories.

    Every day feels fearful to me now, as if something has changed in my brain that has shifted my outlook from nervous optimism to outright pessimism. I had a breakdown on my partner last night and when I started talking about some of the fears I have about upcoming things, I said a line that breaks my heart even now to repeat:

    “I am wanting to prepare for the worst because that is all I can expect nowadays”.

    Making the best out of a bad situation should be an admirable trait, one I can take pride of, especially as someone who has lived in startup culture for the last three plus years and has made a name for herself of trying to be adaptable in times of crisis, knowing how to problem-solve my way out of anything.

    But I resent the fact I have become that person.

    I resent that I can never go long without needing to put out a fire.

    And I hate the fact that everything I am going through is making me a colder person and I do not know what to do to stop it – which I am not even sure I fully agree with saying cause the main thing that differentiates this period of time from the previous absolute worst time of my life is that I actually recognise I have people to live for now.

    I will keep going, I do not want to stop… but I am absolutely praying for a better season to come my way, because quite frankly, this summer has sucked.

    Going to keep it simple with a different review today, talking about another Stardew Valley save of mine that I have with a friend, this time on the Forest Farm layout.

    I have mentioned it in passing before, but I have an obsession with building infrastructure in video games. Paths, roads, transport structures, all of it is fair game for me wanting to make neat layouts & patterns in whatever I play, and Stardew is a game I find surprisingly useful for that purpose, especially when presented with the challenges of any of the nonstandard layouts.

    Forest in particular has been an interesting challenge, in trying to find the perfect blend of farming crops, farming animals, and utilising the main feature of the farm – that being renewable forage and hardwood options.

    Initially I had struggled with this task, especially when it came to building layouts that could work with the sprinkler patterns I usually use without actually having the sprinklers to plan out the infrastructure.

    But as with my mind itself, things start to make a lot more sense around Winter in this game, and without needing to worry about (much) crop watering and focus more on getting stuff organised for the next year, I feel a lot happier plotting out paths and working out where things need to go.

    On this map in particular, it is evidenced by the massive tree farm I am trying to establish in the top middle of the map. This initially started small scale with each tree type being vertically aligned which made collecting forage from the tappers a nightmare, but once I had established where the animal pasture needed to go a lot of space opened up which has led to the larger scale farm pictured above.

    There is definitely still a lot of work to be done on this farm, but considering this is only the end of Year 1, I am extremely excited to see where this goes next.

    Here is where I would usually say something about getting my rhythm back, but honestly, as much as the Redundancy Review will keep going, I am not sure how well I will be able to write individual days depending on my mood – I definitely want to try chronicle my convention holiday each day, but, we will see how it goes.

    Thank you for reading this far if you did, I hope you are able to have a relaxing weekend, a longer one than usual if you are in the UK.

  • Redundancy Review: Day 27, “The End Justifies The Means”

    Redundancy Review: Day 27, “The End Justifies The Means”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia’s Rambles)

    Good morning sharks and seahorses, welcome to Day 27 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    Writing this a lot later than I usually do due to a mix of calls and appointments this morning around different topics which I wanted to tackle before getting my thoughts in line to do the mental health check-in portion of the review.

    I have been presented with an opportunity to do some contracting work which, whilst not entirely in my wheelhouse or interest, is in my area of expertise, that being Quality Assurance. 

    My main feelings around continuing QA work are what the title suggests, being the means that can help justify the way I want to live my life now. My ultimate goal is still wanting to be a writer for hire, telling my own stories whilst helping others to tell their own. If freelancing in tech can help enable that lifestyle, then it is something I should pursue…

    …which I recognise goes against my entire discussion on my burnout a couple reviews back, but the benefit of this being a contracting role is that I would be able to back out if things became too much for me. Even if it was just for a short while, it would get me some additional experience both as a QA and getting more familiar with the freelancing way of life.

    The Redundancy Review would continue even upon taking the contracting role – there is no stopping this train now, especially since the role would let me fund the “eating my way around Shrewsbury” reviews far easier, which are honestly some of my favourite pieces to write.

    There is some part of me that wonders what it would be like to try position myself as a professional food critic, but the problem with that is I love food too much to want to try criticise it intensely – even the most subpar food I will still find things to love about, and in a way I have not forgotten my student days where things such as the “lasanwich” and the “chicken kyiv burger” brought me incredible amounts of comfort.

    I strive to find the positives in everything, and unless something made me physically sick, I would want to try to express those positives.

    Even as I begin to enter into contract work, I will keep myself available for writing work, which if you are reading this and want to hire me, please do! I am available for professional scripting, transcription, and reviews of all sorts, do not catch yourself putting inadequate AI-generated copy out there – invest in a burgeoning writer today!

    Today’s review is another homeware/furnishing review, but one taking a very different form from a flatpack. 

    3M Command Hooks/Command Strips are one of the most useful pieces of kit as someone who rents the place they live rather than own, as like most renters, I am terrified of actually putting a hole in a wall that is not mine. 

    Command products are a godsend in that regard, with all different varieties being in different locations. I have used Small Clear Wire Hooks to build a makeshift tool rack over my hob, and the decorating clips allow me to hang fairy lights around easily, letting me live out my dream of being an e-girl through the aesthetic.

    But today’s subject is a bit more heavy duty than those two, and is used in a very unique and novel way.

    3M Command Large White Wire Hook has a weight capacity of 2.2kg, making it more geared around holding heavier objects with the suggestion on the packaging being a dustpan and brush, whilst also being able to go up to backpacks, bags, or cumbersome tools that are hard to store elsewhere.

    So, what do I use them for?

    Creating a makeshift armoury behind my bed and desk of course.

    These hooks are the absolute ideal way to mount up Nerf guns without drilling any holes to make mounting posts. The main body of the hook is long enough to guide it through the sling points of more slimline blasters, meaning the second hook can be positioned to support another section or be put through another sling point to make a rock solid mount.

    The application of the adhesive strip is incredibly straightforward, with the body of the hook itself being able to be slid off to remove the strip when needed. Each pack comes with two strips so the hook is able to be removed and reapplied elsewhere if they need to be repurposed.

    My guns have been mounted for a period of over four months now and I have not had any issues – a relief given that three of them are mounted over where I sleep, meaning I have not had any rude awakenings. With how well the initial mountings went, I am definitely looking forward to investing in more and expanding my armoury wall.

    That does it for today, thank you for reading the Redundancy Review today. These will continue until morale improves, so I look forward to continuing this journey with all of you.

    The Command Hooks mentioned in this review and many other fine products are available at B&Q in the UK: 3M Command Hooks and Hardware at B&Q (not sponsored, just a fan)

  • Redundancy Review: Day 21, “Community”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: https://rosaliarambles.wordpress.com/2025/06/11/redundancy-review-day-1-a-new-beginning/)

    Good morning rebels and ruffians, welcome to Day 21 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    Numbers are really getting up there now. Not only is it the three week milestone reached, it is now the month of July, a time where I was supposed to actually be off work to wait out the heat… funny how that turned out.

    I continue to be surprised with myself that I have made it this far as well. My redundancy has caused a lot of mental stress to occur which has had the knock-on effect of making certain habits slip some days, but each morning I still get on my laptop and start writing through the grogginess.

    My road trip yesterday had a lot of different conversation topics, but the most interesting of which was finding bits of inspiration for how my voice as a transgender woman can influence my writing and stories.

    Transitioning is… messy, to say the least. There is plenty of advice from elder trans who have come before you but ultimately anyone who walks that path is going to encounter some challenges along the way, and I think that is one of the main points that needs to be amplified in today’s world.

    It is a scary time to be trans, with rising negative sentiment amongst politicians and news media potentially intimidating others to remain in the closet whilst simultaneously making already out people feel uncomfortable in the world they reside in.

    For both parties, I have a message, and whilst I may just be one person, I want to use my voice for good:

    The world is better with you in it. Do not let the ruling class tell you otherwise. You are important, you are valued, and you are beautiful – however you present yourself, you are amazing for living your truth.

    Finding strength in community is what can get us through hard times, and community can take many different shapes. It can be a group of former colleagues banding together to offer each other support during a hard time, it can be a collection of trans people coming together to build everyone up to be their best selves, and it can even be your close group of friends – a found family through shared interests.

    If that impassioned speech resonated, you would be impressed what I can do on other live projects – why not consider hiring me? I put my heart and soul into my work every time, leaving an emotional impact on the reader, or using my inherent sense of logic to write clean, consistent copy for professional projects.

    With us reaching Day 21, and noticing a trend in my previous entries, it is time for another Hololive song review, one that ties in to the themes of community and found family.

    In case it is not already obvious from this being the second group song I am reviewing from them, Hololive English Generation 3 “Advent” are my favourite group within the organisation. Their style, theming, and group coherence made me fall in love from day one with that love never once dimming throughout.

    “Rebellion” is their debut song, released just under two years ago at time of writing. True to their lore of being fugitives the song talks a lot about breaking out of cycles & systems, being freed from cages, and lighting fires in their hearts to embrace new found freedom.

    The rhythm of the song also helps highlight the ever present theme of “dance”, with the word appearing several times during the chorus. With its heavy usage of synth it really does sound like a song that could be played in a club, dancing the night away to a song about breaking free.

    With each Hololive song review I tend to highlight a specific segment of the lyrics, and this time is no different, with me wanting to draw particular attention to the bridge before the final choruses:

    “I know that I can still be

    The future of this story

    I know that I can be free

    The one and the only

    They tell me that I’m crazy

    I’ll never let them stop me”

    It says something that I did not need to go back to the music video to get those lyrics right – this final part of the song before launching back into the chorus is slower than the rest but it is the part I always like to listen out for. 

    Advent’s declaration of wanting to be free in their own story and not wanting to listen to those that put them down resonate heavily with my own experience within life, never wanting to be told to stop. Hearing those words each time I revisit Rebellion brings me immense comfort, much like any time I engage in Advent’s content.

    One final thing, knowing that I need an image for the thumbnail…

    …god Shiori is so pretty, I can not wait to cosplay her.

    That brings us to the end for today. Thank you for sticking with me for three weeks thus far, take it easy whatever you do, and have a great day!

  • Redundancy Review: Day 20, “Road Trip!”

    (for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: https://rosaliarambles.wordpress.com/2025/06/11/redundancy-review-day-1-a-new-beginning/)

    Good morning drivers and racers, welcome to Day 20 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.

    The main thing on my agenda for today is taking a journey with a very close friend of mine. She needs to go pick up some pottery directly from the factory and asked if I wanted to come along, which I gave an enthusiastic yes to. I find myself oddly excited at this prospect, partly for the chance to hang out with someone I resonate a lot with but also the chance to talk in person about how I am feeling.

    It has been mentioned a lot throughout this series but the support my friends have given me has really helped see me through some of the darker days. They help remind me why I am here and to keep on keeping on through the pain, uncertainty, and anxiety that has come with being made redundant.

    On the subject of purpose though, I feel the purpose of the Redundancy Review has changed somewhat since I started. Initially these mental check-ins were only supposed to be one segment of the review followed by an update on my job search, finalising with the review. 

    Talking about the job search has fallen by the wayside, if just because having to write constant reminders of what I am applying for makes rejection feel all the worse due to having a detailed record written down. Applications still go out each day, and I am working on a “living CV” page for the site right now, so there is that.

    But it is time to make an adjustment to the Redundancy Review’s mission statement, and iterate what my main goals are with this daily series.

    1. Primarily, this is to get me out of bed and working on something each morning. Even if I do not feel like it, or even if my brain is foggy, something goes out to keep the habit
    2. This is a story of my lived experience. The homepage emphasises that no Generative AI content will be hosted here, and I will stick to that always. A machine cannot replicate the emotion behind my words, and I will strive to champion human creativity above all else
    3. Whilst the title includes the word “review”, I am not a critic – there are far better people than me to do that job. I am here to spread joy about the things I love and to try make the world a better place through my words

    I am also going to divert my call to action today. Normally I would be asking people to hire me for writing work, but this time I want to give a spotlight to a colleague of mine.

    https://www.behance.net/jordancollins16

    Jordan was the Art Director and 3D Generalist at Immerse, responsible for the look & feel of many projects along with creating some of the most insanely detailed and complicated assets you could come across. His expertise always shined in planning calls, where production would present the idea and his creativity would run wild of what he could accomplish.

    He is an incredibly easy going guy, able to act as a steady presence whenever projects hit that inevitable rocky stage, persevering through the hard times with the goal of laughing about it once it was all over. With how long he had been at the company, he was part of the foundation, and it showed through his dedication to the craft.

    If anyone reading this is in need of a 3D artist, get in touch with him. You will not regret having him involved.

    Time for today’s review, and we are staying in the usual territory of food & drink, but a newcomer into the category.

    Yup. I am talking about a brand of boxed stuffing mix. 

    It came into my mind as I was initially supposed to make a roast dinner yesterday but ended up getting too overheated, changing the plan to a more homely sausage, egg, chips, and beans instead. The stuffing is usually the star of the show when it comes to my roast dinners, and I have Paxo Sage & Onion Stuffing Mix to thank for that.

    I have tried supermarket’s “luxury” range of stuffings, I have tried people’s homemade stuffing mixes, and I have even tried Paxo’s other offerings – but it always comes back to the default to me, possibly out of nostalgia.

    That said, I do not just mix it with hot water, put it in a dish and call it a day. “Rosa Stuffing” as my partner calls it has two main defining features. The first being an addition to make Julia Child proud: copious amounts of butter, added at two different stages – first a healthy amount after the hot water has been added, and then a few small knobs on top once placed into the dish.

    The other is less conventional, an addition that comes from my experience with stuffing growing up. My granny and my mother would always add mushrooms into the mixture to add some extra body and difference in texture, with this small addition now becoming a staple of my own stuffing too.

    Mushrooms are a divisive foodstuff, but it is one I can not get enough of in any dish, with the inclusion of sauteed button mushrooms mixed with a rich sage and onion stuffing giving me comfort beyond compare, even in the context of a comforting roast dinner.

    With that new esoteric addition to the list of things I have reviewed, I will call it there. Thank you for reading today, please keep yourself cool today, at least in the UK it is supposed to hit between 29-31 degrees in some places. Stay hydrated everyone.

    For more information on Paxo products, visit their website here: https://www.paxo.co.uk/