(for context on what this series is, please see my Day 1 post here: Redundancy Review: Day 1, “A New Beginning” – Rosalia Rambles)
Good morning illusionists and conjurers, welcome to Day 107 to 109 of Rosalia Rambles Redundancy Review.
Been a few days since posting something, and that mainly is because my day job ramped up massively in the two days I had left of the working week. Usually I am able to write the majority of a day’s article during my lunch along with bits here and there as downtime between things loading or processing, but things got so hectic that I had no time during my rest periods, which led into wanting to prioritise rest after work.
But now it is Saturday, and after a long period of sleeping in this morning, I feel considerably better in the energy department…
…the mental department is a different story.
The title of today’s review reflects how I am feeling in recent days, though I was also considering the title “Broken Reverie” to describe my feelings in a more accurate way. Much like previous posts, it is hard for me to fully nail down how I am feeling on a given day leading to me using my almost-daily writing practice as a rubber-ducking exercise on myself.
Disillusionment sums up a lot of this year for me, in both my career and, given some of the events of last night, my hobbies as well.
For my career, it is obvious. The collapse of my previous company almost right from under me shattered a lot of how I felt towards my relationship with work, even persisting into my current contract work. I still come in every day, and I am not half-assing what I do to keep my skills sharp… along with the fact I bleed QA even outside of work, finding bugs comes as naturally to me as breathing.
Though something has changed, a very multifaceted change mind, but I will try break it down as best as possible.
There is the loss of community. I loved the team I worked with prior to things falling apart, they were genuinely some of the most skilled individuals I had the pleasure of working with each morning, and the fact we could come together each day to make beautiful applications, striving for new advancements with each project, meant a lot to me.
There is the change in structure. Whilst my career is advancing within this new-but-similar venture, specifically in that I have ownership over a key part of the pipeline within the business model, the smaller structure is still something to get used to. This is not to say I do not get on with my current colleagues, in fact I like to consider myself fairly easy to work alongside – even with my somewhat neurotic approach to quality.
And finally, there is the fact that redundancy/being laid off is a massive psychological wound that influences how I see the world of work now, especially during this time of trying to add AI into everything before the bubble bursts.
Part of why I write the Redundancy Review is because I would not mind finding a career away from the tech industry as a whole. This is not to say I want to leave behind the industry entirely, as I do indeed have the skills to pay the bills when considering my half a decade in quality assurance right now, and there is no denying that manual, human QA will still have its place in the industry even with the prevalence of AI right now.
But I know I can do things outside of the greater tech space, and as much as it feels like a pipe dream, I want to find something where I am not ultimately just doing it for the money. Something that I believe in, and feel comfortable putting my heart & soul into on a day-to-day basis, to try make my career make a difference to the world.
For now, I can keep things going under the current status quo, but I know I can make things change in my future – for the better.
That part of today’s story went a little longer than I anticipated, especially because I have not told the second part about disillusionment with hobbies yet.
Specifically, Magic: the Gathering had their big MagicCon Atlanta event yesterday, which included a lot of reveals and previews of stuff coming in the next year, including more “Universes Beyond” content than initially stated.
For context, Universes Beyond is MTGs name for when they introduce crossover content into the game, and for the first few instances of it I was either completely indifferent or actually excited for the product they were bringing out. Warhammer 40K & Fallout Commander decks specifically were two products I actually really liked and still appreciate today.
But, over time they have been introducing more Universe Beyond content into the release schedule, with this current year having three Standard-legal sets and next year having four Standard-legal sets… and with each reveal, I found myself disconnecting further, my indifference turning into outright exhaustion over the properties being introduced.
The Hobbit, Marvel Super Heroes (they are not even having the decency to port a full comic arc over as a proper story, just a collection of characters thrown into a set) and Star Trek, along with an unannounced set that is theorised to be the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.
This is not including what was announced as part of Secret Lair, Wizards’ limited run set of cards with exclusive art, including crossovers with Iron Maiden, Jaws, The Office, FURBY. All of which has got their selection of fans to be excited, and I am glad for them to be excited by these things.
But I do not feel good about the direction this game is going now. There are so many products all coming out at once, so many properties being slammed into the game in the hope of making the line go up even further.
It says something that after all the reveals were said and done, one of the first things out of my mouth was:
“Well, at least it will be easier to save money next year.”
I have genuinely started to fall out of love with a game that I have been engaging with regularly for over eight years now, and… whilst that genuinely sucks hard, I am trying to maintain some level of optimism.
The first set of the year, Lorwyn Eclipsed, looks genuinely beautiful, and given the history of the plane it will likely feature my favourite creature type. I still intend to play the game with my small group as well, but next year I want to try use the reduced focus on MTG to try other things out.
I want to engage with the Hololive TCG community in the UK, playing in more events and getting more to grips with the game on a serious level. Additionally I am considering making more investments into my food production-related hobbies, increasing my amount of baking equipment along with getting stuffed that will let me explore pickling, preserves, and more.
Disillusionment can suck, especially when it shakes the very core of what we know is familiar. But it can also open doors, as once you snap out of the reverie, things appear more clearly before you, allowing new opportunities to be visible when they might not have been before.
…surprisingly profound statement to end the story today, even more so when I consider I am currently sitting in a dressing gown having done nothing today but vibe, play games, and write.
I am actually going to post this one wholesale, as I think it deserves to stand on its own, and totally not because I have nothing to review because I am skint slash running out of ideas some days, nope, not at all.
That said, I do need a thumbnail…
…yeah, that will do. I guess.
Anyway, thank you for reading today’s edition of the Redundancy Review. I am actually extremely proud in how this one turned out, so I hope you enjoyed reading it. Wherever you are I hope you are able to have an easy Saturday and can relax before the spectre of Monday looms once more.
Rosalia Rambles 
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